Hitting rock bottom yet still haughty
by Paul ~ April 17th, 2011 at 2:25 pm
Satan getting booted out of heaven
One of the most dangerous things that can happen to you is to hit rock-bottom and not learn from it. And I am discovering that it is even more dangerous thing to do is to “help” a person like that by relieving their situation!
In order to see my need for Jesus, I first had to overcome my pride. God provided many means to humble me. In October 2006, two things collided that finally broke my pride. The first was some things I said to Kaelin which almost broke our dating relationship. The other was that my arms were getting extremely painful and swollen. Turns out I had tendinitis and spent – which took me four months to figure out. The pain was so great that I took off work for awhile. It was on one of those days at home that I opened my Bible to the book of Matthew and began to see how much I needed Jesus and desperately needed to obey Him!
Scripture tells us that a similar thing happened to the Apostle Paul. Paul was a pharisee and a persecutor of the church. Jesus had to strike him blind, humbling him greatly, before he would recognize who Jesus really is (Acts 9).
Scripture also tells us of someone who was put in a humbling situation but never humbled. Satan was an angel in service before God. He wanted to set himself over God. God threw him out of heaven and cursed him to be upon the earth. But Satan never got it, and to this day continues in his rampant pride, believing in vain that he can uphold himself against Almighty God. (See Ez. 28, Is. 14:12, Rev. 12:4-9)
I have been meeting people just like Satan, not humbled by what God has brought upon them. These are people who are down and out, hitting rock-bottom, and yet are still pursuing their own prideful path. I know a young guy who is homeless and has wreaked his life, but still thinks he can make it on his own and does not need anyone’s guidance. I’ve ministered to a guy with a long history of wreckage in relationships and yet still blames all of them on other people. I’ve met a woman who is living on state welfare, her life is a mess, and yet she lives haughtily, declaring she does not need God.
What does this person look like? Four major qualities:
1) Haughtiness or pride - This person talks a big game but has no action to back it up.
2) Lack of faithfulness – This person has not followed through on anything, has flaked out or failed almost everything, and continues to do so.
3) Lack of desperation for Jesus – This person will talk about needing God, but will only do so when it is convenient for them. They may express a “need” but it is not a desperate need and it is short-lived.
4) Manipulation – This person will manipulate and exploit other people in order to get what they want. These other people are often well-meaning Christians. I know, I’ve been that person… many times.
Helping these people is dangerous. Or at least the kind of help we are used to. If we try to bring “relief” to their situation (doing for them or giving a hand-out), we will end up hurting ourselves and not helping them. They will fail us and will hurt us, and in the end they will continue on their downward spiral. Our efforts will be in vain. I know this first hand. Many times I have had hope that I could somehow help people out of this. Can God do it? Yes… but there will be clear evidence in the Spirit’s work of transformation, especially in giving them the self-control and faithfulness for them to help themselves instead of relying on someone else’s hand-out (Gal. 5:22-24).
The only way to try to help this person is with “development”. Instead of doing something for them, we need to help them help themselves. This requires them to learn faithfulness and humbles them for their lack of faithfulness in the past. This also requires them to learn boundaries of what is rightful dependence on God and others instead of wrongful exploitation and manipulation. This also communicates to them their desperate need for God, as He is ultimately the only one who can help them by working on their behalf and in their heart.
If you are entering into a situation with a person like this, I highly recommend you learn about development. Check out this brief table comparing relief and development. Or read the book “When Helping Hurts“.
) who stayed up with me! And thank you for your kind words of affirmation and for praying for me! Thanks also to the particular person who reminded me in her prayer that I “haven’t yet reached my prime.”